Hep C Discussion Forum

KPB · Member

RE: Help for my daughter

KPB · Member

Kristen,

I do not know if your daughter has faith in GOD, or if she is a person that could give herself up in hopes that he/she will help her. I was not that type of person, I had to believe in myself to make my recovery obtainable. I have to give you some of my background to set the stage, I grew up with a welding machine in my garage, I learned to weld very young and loved it. I left home at 18, by the time I turned 20 yrs. old. I was traveling around the world welding and making a six figure income. This was more money the my older brothers or parents made in five years, so in my mind, there was nothing more they could teach me about life. I lived like a rock star for the next 25 yrs., I was a tweaker in 13 different countries, some of those countries would have given me a death sentence if I was caught. But no one could tell me anything, after hitting bottom a half dozen times and blowing more than a million dollars on street drugs.

.......Enough: - I want you to know.............that

12 step programs convinced my parents that addiction is a hereditary disease that somehow gets pasted down from parents to children.

I want you to know : THAT IS CRAP !

addiction is a personnel choice that your daughter made all on her own

The link I have provided for you below gave me the tools to help me understand and recover from my addiction.

http://www.rational.org/index.php?id=51

You and/or your wife are not at fault, your daughter needs to be responsible for her own mistakes.

give her information, not money

Groupergetter · Guru

Dear Kristen,

It's good your daughter has someone who is loving, and willing to try and help her. Our entire family has been hurt and affected by my brother and his addictions. My parents spent their entire lives trying to help him.,,,, to no avail. He has been thru rehab multiple times, and in a sense their assistance served only to enable his behavior. His driver's license has been revoked for life, he is in poor health and he even now (in his 60's) he blames all his problems on others. His life has been one of manipulation and deceit.

It used to be the road to recovery for HepC was long and hard, the interferon and Riba for months on end were very difficult. Today the treatment for HepC is probably easier than "curing" the addiction problems. I agree with others that at this point, your daughter's recovery from alcohol, drugs, and all that accompanies this lifestyle is paramount. Ultimately the choice, desire, and will to change, must come from your daughter. Poor decisions in life have long term affects and are not easily overcome. Establishing new friends, a social network, and a means of support takes time.

Having children of my own I understand the desire to help your daughter. As the old saying "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink" comes to mind. If there is a way to encourage your daughter to read and personalize the New Testament it could be a God send. In our fast paced, "progressive", and gray shaded world, there are still unchanging fundamental truths. (whether one wishes to accept this or not). I pray your daughter will be able to rise above and overcome that which holds her down. I pray also, that you and your family will be given the insight to know best how to deal with this difficult situation. May God Bless you, your daughter, and your family.

-- Edited by Groupergetter on Sunday 19th of July 2015 11:03:12 AM

Kristen · Member

i would love to hear more! We will no longer put our lives on hold for her at every moment nor we will make ourselves finacailly broke. We've been down those roads too many times. Extremely interesting 2 days. She called yesterday and told me wife "come get me and take me to the rehab you guys found in Georgia". My wife left yesterday at 3 pm, picked her up, drove into GA, got a hotel for the night and then dropped her off. She just got home tonight and is asleep while I just got home from work. So, I don't know all that went down on the drive but the little we discussed on phone it was pretty bad. She never quit talking and caring on about this that and all in between. Obviously tweaking.....and scared I'm sure. The good news is she is now in a rehab with a great rep for the next 6 months or a year. I pray tonight for my daughter to stick this out. I pray she makes it through and firmly grabs the future..,,sober and away from some really bad people that just used her. I thank God that brought my wife to me 33 years ago with upcoming 31st anniversary. I thank and pray for everyone on this site for making us feel so....comfortable. It is awesome. I'm amped up with hope tonight and yes, any stories that can be told I would love to hear. Even if you want to rant...bring it. I'd love to listen. Finally I hope suffering from however they came across the bad virus called HCV, they can be cured. Finally I pray for myself to continue to have hope for my 27 yr old daughter. I love her no matter this last 10 yrs. I love her. Thank you. I will update as we find out more. Very critical time right now. Goodnight and thank you all

KPB · Member

Kristen,

I believe I am staying on topic

The fact that you and your wife are supporting your daughter show you are concerned parents. At this cross roads in your daughter's life, getting and staying clean is in my opinion more important than getting help for her hep c . Each person has different thoughts about getting clean, and it is important to understand that if one self help program doesn't work for your daughter, there are other programs that may work for her. So I would like to share a bit about my drug addiction, and how I over came that addiction. The most command program out there are the 12 steppers, and after years of trying and failing those steps. Because I had a very hard time believing in the taught process of 12 steps, believing that there is a greater power over my addiction then my own.

So after 20 years of trying and failing, I found a rational thinking based program. This program taught and allowed me to believe that I am not only the highest power over my mind & body. But that I am the only power capable of convincing myself that addiction is a choice and not a disease that I have no control over. There is no pill for addition so your daughter will have to find what will work for her. For YOUR sake.....I hope it doesn't take her 20 years to find her way, because I realize now, that my parents when through hell over my addiction and they did not live long enough to see me get clean.

anyway, I will stop for now and if you would like to know more.......? just ask...

Brian1412 · Guru

Kristen wrote:
Thank you soooo much. It's been a very trying day.....then again so has the last 10 yrs. At least she's finally taking steps. My wife and I can only hope she's gets the whole "sober" thing and actually this hep C diagnosis might actually be an extremely important turn-of-events thing to get her to stay on course. Certainly time will tell. I've got a lot of reading to do and very much appreciate this forum and all the education I'll get from it. Thanks again. I am truly grateful.
Who would have thought hep c would get yo the point that in some ways easier to treat than the addiction..

You guys have the right idea on how to deal with the addiction and the now cure for the hep c will be there when its time

I wish you all the best

B

Brian1412 · Guru

Prayers to you all..

Kristen · Member

Thanks...everyone. I truly appreciate the advice and direction. We have a lot of work to do with all this recent change but hopefully she gets into a solid rehab, stays clean , learns that the party and drug days are over but, life will get sooo much better. I'll keep posting as things go along and I will keep reading on information and sites suggested. Peace to all of you and being all together. It's cool!!

Fireman Rob · Senior Member

Hi Kristen & Diane,

i'm sorry you're going through this difficult time. The only thing I will add to avoid redundancy is, everyone's body reacts differently to Hep C. Furthermore, alcohol and drugs will definitely speed up the chances for serious damage. Hopefully this is motivation for her to get sober, and quick. I had HCV for 10 years and now that I've successfully treated, many positive, physical changes have occurred.

On a more positive note, she should consider herself lucky to be diagnosed sooner than later. No one deserves this disease and luckily it's now treatable. After sobriety, her chances of a great outcome and second chance at a healthy life are great!

I hope only the best for you both.

Best,

Rob

Scruffy · Guru

I thought maybe she was living a distance from you and home would be a new place. I understand every thing your saying. Being home would not have helped me either as most of my friends there were in the same place I was. Hope it works out for ya's

God Bless

-- Edited by Scruffy on Thursday 16th of July 2015 11:00:48 PM

Kristen · Member

Scruffy- I truly wish we could but to be honest, it wouldn't be in anyone's best interest. We have several facilities with great programs that are waiting for her to call them that we provided while she was in detox. Interesting that as her parents, we have no rights, as they say, since she's over 18. As well through all we've done the past 10 yrs trying to help, I found its very true that ONLY that person can make that choice to get help. We love her so much but like millions before us and after, we know now we can only do this by her OWN actions And not ours. As for living here, she is to close to those who would keep her on the present path and we just couldn't trust her, at her present situation. It's that bad and trust me, we live in a in a nice area and I truly wish it would be so simple to say "stay here". I was hoping more than anything that the 2 day old diagnosis of HCV would/will get her to at last say "I'm thoroughly done with this drug life and now choose to live life again". Until that, my wife and I will stand by ready to drive her to the places who are waiting. It's her only choice. If she doesn't follow through, as hard as it is to say, we are ready for the ultimate fallout. Sucks but that's how deep this is. Others who see this and have been there know exactly what I'm saying and further understand the addict has to change. So much to say. I'm so thankful as I've said before, for this site and all I've learned so quickly. I sure hope a cure 100% for everyone with the HCV, everyone, is here or right around the corner. I will stay committed to helping not only her but hopefully others. Thank you for your time. It is appreciated very much.

Scruffy · Guru

Hi Kristen

Any way you can get her back home? I would suggest that. Home with you and not with her friends I think she would stand a better chance of making it while shes waiting for the 28 day stay. Even more so if they used a substitute drug to detox her.

Best for you.

Brian1412 · Guru

Hi kristen, where i live there are so many people trying to get detox they are kind of doing the same thing. Get them in and out. I am not sure where you all live but here, our county social services is very helpfull in finding solutions to this type of issues. Many counties have facilities that have a combo sobriety\ residential. Hep c. Facility. Usually at no cost. I would also call the local Narcotics anonymous. Central office as they would know different options available. Ideally if she could get in one of these combo facilities she could be in a safe sober place and have the hep c addresed.when needed The rehab is most important. It was over a year befor a dr even talked to me about treatment. For hep c. Definately contact your county. Social services and. Narcotics Annon central offices. Someone there will know where to get her help. Health department also. Also. She needs to know what is at stake. Hep c is a slow disease that effects the liver. Alcohol is no friend of the liver and is like gas on a fire. Pretty. Much any of the drugs are the same. We have a huge problem with a new synthetic drug called flaka going around . It is devastating. And deadly. So much so that they pretty much throw out the rules and it takes like 5 cops to hold them down and each occurance . They burn. Their organs from inside.... One more thing, if she is in any way in the court system the judge or probation. Office is applicable for assistance I am the only one in my family who avoided drugs and alcohol. It took alot but everyone in my family who had the issue now measures their sobriety in decades... there are millions of people in the world who. Are now. Sober so there is hope.... Your in our prayers. Brian

Cinnamon Girl · Guru

Hi, sorry to hear that, you must be feeling very frustrated about the situation today.

Overcoming addiction can be a long and complex process, unfortunately, which involves a lot more than the physical withdrawals as I`m sure you know only too well. The psychological and emotional aspects are just as difficult to get through, and it usually means avoiding mixing with a whole social scene, which really isn`t easy to do.

But the fact that your daughter has said she wants to go into long term treatment is a very good sign that she is determined to beat this. And the fact that she is in contact and talking to you, is also very positive.

I`m glad you and your wife are managing to remain optimistic, I appreciate how hard this must be for you.

You`re welcome to post your updates here or use our Rant and Rave section, whichever you prefer. I`m glad we can be here for you during this process.

Take good care and keep us posted...

Kristen · Member

update- the detox let her out after just 5 days. No warning to us so now she is probably with the same people but she did call us at 6am wanting to go to a long term treatment center. As we know she has to get sober 1st then we can get her started on HCV treatment. This is going to be some very long days coming up and the worry of her using. I hope not But today doesn't sound promising. We will hope and pray something goes right. She is on a list for a 28 day stay but no beds available right now. Sucks. Gueas I should go to rants and let go on that. Frusterated with courts, gov and system in trying to save her life. The HCV diagnosis is just another chapter in our life that just keeps spinning. All that said and what is left unsaid, I very much appreciate this forum/site and how others shared their stories as well as the advice. So much to learn here. Anyone reading this, please know we are positive and upbeat. Thank you

Rufus1 · Member

Welcome you've come to the right place these folks are very helpful and supportive good luck to you A

Tess · Senior Member

Welcome! I'm sorry you're going through this difficult time. The good (very good) news is that your daughter is finding help now, and that the available treatments for Hepatitis C have made phenomenal breakthroughs during just the past year.

It's not a fast moving disease and many of us have had it for 3 decades or more while living pretty normal lives. Prior to last fall, the treatments were physically difficult and the success rates were disappointing. But the new treatments are hugely successful, are easy to take (Harvoni is one little pill a day for 8, 12 or 24 weeks) and usually have few if any side effects. One thing to keep in mind is that the new HCV treatments are very expensive so health insurance coverage is an important issue. If she is choosing an insurance provider now, their policy toward HCV treatment is something to consider.

My heart goes out to you. Your daughter is on the right path.

Best wishes,

- Tess

Cinnamon Girl · Guru

Hello Diane, welcome, I'm so glad you've joined us.

I agree with what Tig said, your daughter will need to complete the rehab program and be completely clean from drug use before treatment for the Hep C can be initiated. But don't let that alarm you, in the majority of cases this is a very slow moving disease and it's unlikely that your daughter has been infected for long enough for it to have caused significant damage.

In some ways she is very fortunate to have found out about it at this stage, many of us here had been infected for a long time, decades in some cases, before we received our diagnosis.

Your daughter is young and has a lot of living ahead of her, and with support and a lot of determination on her part there's no reason why she won't be able to get through this and make a fresh start on her life.

I just want to let you know you'll have our full support here, and we'll be here for you as long and as much as you need us. I'm a mother myself and I really feel for you and your husband in this situation.

Do keep in touch, I wish you all the very best of luck... smile

...Jill

wmlj1960 · Moderator

I also would like to welcome you both to the forum. Based on my experience as a long time drug abuser who is now clean I agree with everything that has been said. Recovering from drug addiction has to be her most important goal at this point and then the Hep C can be treated once the addiction recovery process has been established. It's never an easy process for the addict or for her loved ones, but it's doable. First things first and like Tig said, take care of yourselves. I wish you all well on this journey and hope you will keep us up to date on your progress through to her clean, Hep C free future. smile

Tig · Admin

Hi Diane,

Without knowing any of the particulars regarding her Hep C, I can only speak in generalities. If you happen to know any of the lab tests completed, feel free to share them. They help us provide better informed opinions. Liver blood tests, like the ALT and AST, the genotype and viral load are very helpful. As her parents, you may have certain rights to obtain copies of her treatment records while she's in rehab. It's worth asking about.

With that said, it's my opinion that she will be able to wait for treatment anyway. Most insurance carriers and doctors require proof of no less than 90 days sobriety before recommending a patient for treatment. I have yet to see one that hasn't. At her age, it's unlikely that she has progressed to a level of disease that waiting to treat will cause additional problems. So I wouldn't worry about that right now. She needs to jump this first hurdle before trying the second. One day at a time.... We're here for you!

PS: Welcome! smile

Diane321 · Newbie

I am the mother. And also brand new to the forum. our daughter, 27, is in detox and just got this diagnosis today. The plan, which I hope she will do, is go from detox to a three to six month rehab. With this diagnosis, is it ok to wait until after the rehab to start getting medical treatment for the hep c. Thanks for any guidance you can give!

Tig · Admin

Welcome from me too! You're among friends here and if there is anything I (we) can assist you with, just say the word. Feel free to send a private message if you have any questions to anyone here. We have a great bunch of caring and knowledgeable individuals here.

If you haven't spotted the Search function above, make use of it. It accesses all the posts related to your query. Just use a keyword or two and you'll get a list of links.

If you need any help navigating the forum or procedures, just let me know. I wish you and your daughter the very best. She has made the first step to a new and healthy future. She obviously has a great family support system working for her and that's huge in this recovery process. As you care for her though, be sure to care for yourselves. It's very easy to forget when you have so much going on. Best of luck, I'm very glad you're here!

It's a new day...

Kristen · Member

Thank you soooo much. It's been a very trying day.....then again so has the last 10 yrs. At least she's finally taking steps. My wife and I can only hope she's gets the whole "sober" thing and actually this hep C diagnosis might actually be an extremely important turn-of-events thing to get her to stay on course. Certainly time will tell. I've got a lot of reading to do and very much appreciate this forum and all the education I'll get from it. Thanks again. I am truly grateful.

Scruffy · Guru

Hiya

Your right,only your daughter can help herself. Others can help but in the end its all up to her. If she really wants to quit she will. I've been down that road and in reality there was nothing any one could do it had to come from me. She has to get clean and stay away from that world to open herself up to the real world. She won't get treatment for the hep c unless shes clean. You can guide her and help her to be strong. Its pretty easy to treat the hep with the new treatments but the cure for addiction has to come from her.

Best wishes for you guys and your daughter.

Cinnamon Girl · Guru

Here`s a link to an article you might find helpful to read, you`ll find lots of basic information here...

http://hcvadvocate.org/hepatitis/First%20Steps/First_Steps_with_Hepatitis_C_for_the_Newly_Diagnosed.pdf

Please don`t hesitate to ask any questions, we`re here to help...

Cinnamon Girl · Guru

Hello and welcome, I`m glad you found us.

I`m sure this must be a terribly anxious time for you and your wife, this is every parent`s nightmare, but Brian is right. This is your daughter`s chance to turn her life around and regain her health and well-being. Is Kristen your daughter`s name, if you don`t mind me asking?

Many of us here were infected with the Hep C virus because of stupid behaviour in our youth, so rest assured you`re with friends here, we do understand.

The fact that she is getting help is a very positive step forward, and once she has got through the rehab process and is clear of drugs then she will be able to start treatment to clear the Hep C. It`s a very treatable disease these days and your daughter will have the rest of her life ahead of her.

She obviously has very loving and caring parents, and with your support she will get through this. Just try to stay positive.

Wishing you all the best... do have a look around the forum and you`ll see very many success stories here. smile

Kristen · Member

Thanks Brian. My wife just called crying about it. I'll check out more on this forum to learn as much as I can. I'm sure this is a good thing. We've got another long road to go down. Her getting sober and staying sober is most important in this recent news. I'll read more on this forum later and hopefully I'll learn a lot.

Brian1412 · Guru

Well,its good she is hetting help with her addictions.thst is a positive. As far as hep c discovery. I hope she understands it is the end of her party days as drugs and alcohol make it much worse. The good news as far as the hep c is it is now curable with little side effects. But she has to stop the drugs drink etc The rehab place should know about hep c and the new treatments and can help facilitate. Treatment. Hopefully she will know the gift if sobriety and grab for it.. Wish you the best..

Kristen · Member

after 10 yrs of drug use my daughter finally checked herself into drug rehab. It has been hell. She just called from facility crying saying she has been diagnosed with Hep C. I just looked it up to get info On it. I'm thankful she has finally realized only she can help herself but I need advice on what to do as her father. She has a long way to go but is stepping in the right direction. Any advice and suggestions is greatly appreciated. I'm lost

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